New England Review

I forgot to mention that NER has updated its website to include the most recent issue, vol 28 no 3. The current contents include poems by Molly Tamarkin, Dick Allen, and G.C. Waldrep. We have also updated our recent news about our contributors.

And what kind of editor would I be if I didn't say the following: "We are always looking for more subscribers, and you can subscribe on-line." Hell, if you decide to subscribe on-line, you can use the discount code "SPCNER" to get a year of NER for only $20 (instead of $25). Think about it.

Amor y Preguntas

As sick as this will sound, I have another frackin' poem in my head. I have been humming it to myself now since yesterday. I even have the closing line and the opening line. And I have a good 8 lines in between, about 2 near the opening and 6 flat in the middle. I am still working out the thread, the argument. I think I know it, but am not sure yet. I find myself thinking about: confession, the screen, prayer, shower stall, feet, being naked, soap, mouth, liturgy, litany, sacrifice... Yes, it is obvious that I am Catholic, well, a lapsed-Catholic.


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Yay! Friday! Boo! Bay Bridge closed this weekend.


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In a month I will be in NYC and then in upstate New York. I am so excited about this I have a difficult time believing I am me. I have never been given the luxury of having time to do nothing but write and revise and organize and read. I might not know what to do with myself!


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This is a photo of Tim McQuillan and Sean Fritz, two Iowa State college students who were the first same-sex couple to get married this morning after Judge Hanson ruled yesterday that Iowa's ban on same-sex marriage is unconstitutional. Judge Hanson ordered same-sex couples be allowed to receive marriage licenses. Well, since this morning when these two tied the knot, 11 other same-sex couple tied the knot. Sadly, the Court has now placed a stay until further judicial review. I love this photo. It makes me happy. Isn't life too short to deny two consenting adults, two human beings, the right to publicly acknowledge their love?


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Clue: Effigy


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BAP 2007

Oh, come now. You know you are curious. You know you want to take a sneak peek.

Polling

Like I said earlier today, homophobia is one of the last sanctioned bigotries, so much so you can find things like this in a newspaper and no one thinks anything of it. Imagine the uproar if such broad-based stereotypes were used in a prank poll about being Jewish or Latino. There would be outrage. But this, this is for the most part fine. The NY Post routinely refers to gay men as "limp-wristed" and "swishy." So, why am I surprised?

Re-Write, Re-Vision, Erasures

No one likes to be harassed, but getting a friend to go back with you to beat the crap out of someone is a little odd, don't you think. I mean, isn't that assault with intent? Tucker Carlson tells the world he went back to a bathroom and assaulted a man, crashed his head into a stall. Funny how once folks got hold of this, MSNBC re-aired the segment and simply deleted Carlson's little macho tale of assaulting a man. What, does MSNBC think it can simply re-write this? Yeah, we are so much more enlightened today in America. Yeah, homophobia is not as bad. Give me a break. Homophobia remains the one sanctioned bigotry in the U.S. Unlike racism and sexism, you don't even have to try and hide it...


****************************


Cormac McCarthy picks up a prize across the Pond.


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More about MTVu and the NPS, from CNNMoney (of all things):

"Today mtvU also unveils a first-of-its-kind opportunity for a top college poet to be published by HarperCollins as part of the prestigious National Poetry Series (NPS). For nearly 30 years the NPS has held an annual competition to find and expose the best emerging and standout poets in the country, and next year, for the first time, one of the series' five published titles will be designated as a book-length manuscript composed by a college student. Pulitzer Prize-winning poet Yusef Komunyakaa will judge submissions for the National Poetry Series mtvU Prize, and the winning student will interview Mr. Komunyakaa for an episode of mtvU's series "My Shot With..." Submissions will be accepted beginning later this fall, and the winning manuscript will be published in 2008 as part of the NPS' 30th anniversary series."


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One of my best friends is having surgery today. Send good thoughts, please. Think good thoughts.


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If you haven't taken the latest poll, please do. I am re-posting it here:

Poetry Prestige

The Big Four has long been considered the National Book Award, the Pulitzer, the National Book Critics Circle Award, and the LA Times Book Award.

Which of the following contests is considered the most prestigious for Poetry?

National Book Award
Pulitzer Prize
National Book Critics Circle Award
LA Times Book Award
All bestow prestige on its winners
None of them confer much to their winners

View Results

Create your own myspace poll



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Clue: Verbena Leaves, crushed!


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The Vortex

On the last day of Bread Loaf, during the afternoon reading, there was a tempest. There is little else one could call it. As Doug Trevor read, suddenly the wind accelerated, the curtains behind him started lifting, the rain began whipping around the outside of the Little Theatre in a circle, like a vortex, just like a vortex, the rain moving horizontally around the theatre, like a tornado, and Doug nervously reading and the doors slamming shut, suctioned shut, the building shaking. It was the scariest and most incredible thing at the same time. Doug kept reading. We all sat there and kept listening. And toward the end of his reading, the torrent died down. But I will never forget that as long as I live, seeing a grey wall of water moving left out one side's windows and right out the opposing one, the rain like a sheet swung round the building, the trees uprooting and taking flight. It was intense...


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Twice now, in a month, two separate poets I asked to send me work have knocked the wind out of me with their poems. I rarely ever solicit work, but it is sometimes worth it. Usually when I solicit poems, I end up rejecting them. But the poems I got today just took the top of my head off, cleanly. It was an exquisite sensation. There was even a poem in the bunch I wish I had written. I hate that, by which I mean I love that. I hate the fact I didn't write the poem, but I love the fact that someone did. All day I have been energized, excited. That is all it takes for me at times, some brilliant poems. They reaffirm something for me. They make me happy.


****************************


I got a rather nasty email from someone asking why I love to ridicule Young Republicans. Well, I don't ridicule them, I just point out their, at times, rampant homophobia. And I feel I have every right to do that. Why? Because I was a Young Republican. You read right. I was a Young Republican. I even campaigned for Bob freaking Dole at one point. I know what it means to feel as if one has to be a certain way, even when in their heart they know they aren't. So, I ridicule the Young Republicans. What harm? Maybe, just maybe, if even one gay YR out there comes out of the closet now rather than having to live through years of denial like I did, then I have done some good. Now, back to our usual programming...


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The Hat returns!


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Clue: Pestilence


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Winners?

Who knew Porn could be so useful?


*******************************


This MTVu thing keeps getting weirder. Now, they are teaming up with the National Poetry Series. One of the five NPS winners will now be the winner of the MTVu prize. The winner will get tour and appearance opportunities provided by MTVu. Book will be published by HarperCollins. And of course, the entrants for this new variation of the NPS must be a college student (undergrad or grad). So, basically, one of the NPS slots is now set aside specifically for students. Maybe this will prompt the NPS to do more for the winners of their prize. The long-standing rumor is that winners have their books published by the various presses but that most presses then don't do a thing for the book because they didn't contract the book. We'll see.


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The music played at the opening of Six Feet Under is in my head this morning. Very odd.


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What contemporary poetry books are you reading right now? Are any of them knocking your socks off? Tell me. Inquiring minds want to know. Seriously.


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Poetry Prestige

The Big Four has long been considered the National Book Award, the Pulitzer, the National Book Critics Circle Award, and the LA Times Book Award.

Which of the following contests is considered the most prestigious for Poetry?

National Book Award
Pulitzer Prize
National Book Critics Circle Award
LA Times Book Award
All bestow prestige on its winners
None of them confer much to their winners

View Results

Create your own myspace poll



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Clue: Oh Ramone, good times, good times...


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Deprived? Depraved? Deprostitated?

I got 5 hours of sleep last night, which really helped. I was so tired after coming home from the Mountain. Maybe tonight I can get another 5 or 6 and then feel more caught up.


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More about the poet in my dreams. That said, he hasn't shown up in one of my dreams in at least a month or two now.


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I miss Jacob. He is off in Seattle at a meeting. I find myself looking for him in the house when I get home. And even though we talk on the phone, I find myself still looking for him to tell him things. Odd. Usually when we are apart, I am the one who is away. So, being home without him seems really weird. Being away without him doesn't seem as weird.


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How is it my friends are always in the news. Well, in this case I am happy for this friend.


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A former student of mine recently told me Jacob is what makes me a good person. This former student may, in fact, be right. Not sure. Either way, this former student has some kind of nerve telling me this in the first place! What the hell!!


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The new poem is shaping up in my head. It is very close to being finished. And the other poem, the first of the year, is also close to being finished. Nice.


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Clue: Kryptonite


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Flies on the Wind Screen

Another Poet Laureate. Who knew?


****************************


An interesting article on Chris Wiman and his book of critical essays.


****************************


What is up with the Bush Administration? They are dropping like flies...


****************************


I did not dream last night. I passed out from exhaustion. I slept for 5 hours without even moving. I woke up in exactly the same position and knew I had to get up to get ready for clinic.


****************************


Clue: smell-a-vision


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Regulate

As some of the regular readers of this blog know, I have bad travel karma. I mean, BAD. Yesterday is just another entry in bad travel. I left the Mountain on the 10:00 o'clock van. I was supposed to leave the Burlington airport on a flight at 1:50pm. Was to connect to a flight in Newark to head back to SF. The flight in Burlington was delayed because Newark stopped taking flights. Um, like what is up with THAT?! So, we finally are allowed to take off from Burlington. But we spend 1 hour on the runway. And then we circle Albany for 30 mins. I should point out that Albany was not in the itinerary, but again, Newark had cut back on letting flights land. I finally get to Newark and then they have no gate for us! So we sit on the plane for another 30 mins. I am now supposed to be boarding the flight to SF. But no worries, that plane is delayed as well. So, I sit in Newark for 2 hours. And so we finally board the flight to SF, only to leave the gate and sit on the run way for 90 mins. I was supposed to be home in SF around 8:00 pm. I got home around midnight. The best part, waiting for 45 mins for the folks at SFO to get our luggage to us at baggage claim. And the government gave up regulating the airline industry for what reason?


*****************************


Bread Loaf was a good time. I was surprised to learn how many folks check The Muse. It was actually a little funny. Folks who have never met me asked about Jacob, as if he were a long-standing friend. I loved that. Virtual Jacob.


*****************************


At some point in the near future, I am hoping to restructure my work life. The time has come. Time to cull. Time to winnow down. I am juggling too many things.


*****************************


And you thought I was cranky. This is cranky!


*****************************


"A bit of doggerel in a Massachusetts newspaper implied that the Freemasons, that venerable but secretive fraternity, were engaged in homoerotic intimacy. The satire, with a graphic engraving, appeared on the front page of the Boston Evening Post in 1751. Both image and poem mocked the Freemasons in an early version of gay-baiting. The image depicted two smiling men, one bent over receiving a trunnel..."


*****************************


Clue: Garage Mahal


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Victor #20

And the winner of Caption Contest #20 is Collin Kelley for:




"Does this sweater make me look fat?"


****************************


Congratulations, Collin. You get bragging rights galore!


****************************


Runner-up: Jim Matthews for: "Dude, I ask to borrow some clothes to play tennis, and THIS is what you give me."


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Message from the Mountain

I survived the overnight flight and made it to the Mountain on schedule. Today is my long day of one on one meetings, group meetings, presentations, and then dinner tonight for all of the NER contributors who are here. Class later in the week. Good to be back here. The energy in the air here is always amazing to me.


***************************


Jacob hopes to have a winner for the Caption Contest soon, so if you haven't entered yet, now would be the time to do so.


***************************


Open Books, a great bookstore! Successful, too!


***************************


"I think of my own poems as friendly, but I also think they're rather complicated..." (Billy Collins has a few things to say)


***************************


Best New Poets 2007 finally announced. Congratulations to NER contributors Robin Ekiss and Cecily Parks on being selected.


***************************


Clue: Luke, I AM your father...


***************************

Off to the Mountain

All errands are done. Suitcase packed. Once Jacob gets home from lab, off to get mexican food for dinner and then off to the airport. Will land in Newark tomorrow morning at 8 AM, make my connection and arrive in Burlington around 10 AM. Then the ride up to the Mountain, which should put me at Bread Loaf around lunchtime. I need to drink many drinks tonight so I can fall asleep on the damned plane!

The funny thing is I have been going to Bread Loaf since 1999 (with the exception of one year), so I can even tell you tomorrow at lunch the faculty and fellows will be serving the food instead of the waiter-scholars. There will be the hayride while I am there, and the gala reception as well as the gala farewell dinner. The weirdest thing about going for the last four days is that you see/experience the same things, which I don't mind. I kind of like it that way. In 2003, I was a Fellow there and the 10 days of the entire conference seemed like a month! Bread Loaf time is not regular time.

While there I will be busy, but not too busy: one on one meetings with folks, a group session on publishing, a presentation on NER, a dinner with former contributors to NER, teach a class. Some of my best friends are there, so it should be a fun time as always.


****************************


If you haven't entered the Caption Contest below, what are you waiting for?


****************************


Clue: Bitchslapper!


****************************

Caption Contest #20

No, say it isn't so. Ah, but yes. It is most definitely so. It is that time again. For some, you have been waiting patiently. For others, you hoped it would never ever happen again. But yes, it is time for the caption contest once more. For those who are new here, the winner gets bragging rights and may or may not win a surprise monetary prize (already decided by us here at The Muse before posting this). Captions should be left in the comment section below, and the winner will be selected by our resident judge, Jacob. Jacob's decisions are final.

Winners of the Caption Contest this year so far are:

#12 : Justin Evans

#13 : Anne Haines

#14 : ADT

#15: Joseph Massey

#16 : Eddie Dixon

#17 : John Gallaher

#18 : R.J. Gibson

#19 : Simmons Buntin


So far this year, no one has taken a win twice! This will make for a VERY interesting "End of the Year Caption Contest Showdown." Will YOUR name be added to this list? Will you show us how it's done? Give us your captions, and tune in to see what happens.


****************************





****************************


Let the games begin...


****************************

Sharp

I did not post this morning because I had some stuff racing around in my head since yesterday. Even after revising the new poem, my brain was muddled, weary and weird. I kept seeing mathematical equations, specifically that most famous of equations about energy, mass, the speed of light. I thought it had something to do with the poem I had been working on because Physics plays a peripheral role in that poem, but I realized this morning that these ideas and words were not part of that poem. I knew the minute I realized this, there was another poem brewing. "Risk your life" and "Sharp, too" kept coming back to me. I didn't, at first understand these phrases. But then the idea of brutish tenderness, in all of its ridiculous paradoxes, came to mind. The last line. I had the last sentence and line of a poem. And then the first came. But I thought it was too early. In the car driving to work, the lines kept accumulating. I came in to my office, did some paperwork, worked on a patient's radiation plan, dictated some charts, but the poem would not leave me alone. Cane fields, the way boys will be boys, violence, knife, kiss: Sharp, too! I sat down to jot notes, but within 15 mins, I had a draft of the poem. So weird to spend 6+ months waiting for my first poem of the year and then to find another one so soon. But no complaints here. I am actually very happy with the draft. Very happy, indeed.


***************************


Clue: Ibiza, of course...


***************************

Snowfalls Hiss!

As some know, I keep files of poems for different things: forms, subject matter, specific things I am interested in like poems that have knives in them, all kinds of stuff. Well, today I found this one lonely poem between files. I must have pulled it at some time and then never put it back. I have no idea what file it used to live in now. And this bothers me for reasons I cannot explain. I cannot remember if I collected this poem for some formal strategy or because of something in the content. I have no file on poems with snow in it. Nor do I have one about geese. And so, I have been driving myself nuts as to why I photocopied this poem and where I originally filed it. I mean most of my files still make sense to me, though some now make no sense to me at all. I have a file on poems in quatrains. Why I do is beyond me. Anyway, here is the poem:

THE WHITE SNOW


The angels the angels in the sky

One’s dressed as an officer

One’s dressed as a chef today

And the others sing

 

Fine sky-coloured officer

Sweet Spring when Christmas is long gone

Will deck you with a lovely sun

          A lovely sun

 

The chef plucks geese

          Ah! Snowfalls hiss

          Fall and how I miss

My beloved in my arms



--Guillaume Apollinaire

****************************


Soy sauce, Chinese mustard, fresh ginger, green onions, black pepper, white pepper, white onions, cubes of rib eye steak. Fire the wok to hell hot and throw in the previously mentioned stuff. Flash fry the devil out of it and serve with medium grain "sticky" rice (never with that awful long-grain icky stuff like Uncle Ben's). De-lish-US!


****************************


My love-hate relationship with Marianne Moore is in full swing toward hatred right now. The pendulum will swing again. I have no idea why, but Moore is a poet that both thrills me and enrages me at times. It is irrational.


****************************


I am ready for Bread Loaf. Emailed in my handout for my class. Sorted my stuff here at home. Wishing I could sneak away to Costa Rica to lounge around naked on a beach and snorkel when the mood hit me. Alas, Vermont instead of Costa Rica. I guess the Loaf is better than Starke. No electric chair in Vermont.


****************************


Re-entered the poem. Reverted a previous change. Found the right line for which I had been searching. I think the poem is practically done now. Of course, this may change tomorrow. But I feel good about it.


****************************


Clue: Whimsy!


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Rivers

Sunny again today in SF, which is unusual. But no complaints here. Maybe Fall has arrived early? Who knows? So, again, I was up pretty early today. And right now, the sky is that blue we dream about and the light is doing its gauzy San Francisco thing.


***************************


Redeye Tuesday night to land me in Vermont Wednesday morning. Should be up to Bread Loaf by lunchtime. Much to do before I leave. But I am kind of excited to go again.


***************************


Ran across Garrett Hongo's book The River of Heaven this morning and re-read it. I had forgotten how good it is. It has been quite a long time since that book came out. I wonder if a new book is on the horizon.


***************************


I am thinking of giving Victoria Chang a run for her money by getting another degree.


***************************


I am having trouble with Gmail. I can't seem to attach documents in order to send them, which is weird seeing I have never had this problem before.


***************************


Thinking again about Heart of Darkness. Thinking a lot about shifty narrators and untrustworthy narratives. No idea why I am thinking about this, but it is on my mind. Veils upon veils upon veils.


***************************


So sunny it makes you want to mix up some gins and tonic, fire up the grill, lounge in the backyard. Gag!


***************************


Clue: I've never seen anyone do THAT much glint before...


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Doors

In a surprise move, the sun was up and visible this morning in San Francisco. And so, despite vowing last night that I would sleep in, I was up at 7:30 AM. In some ways, that is sleeping in seeing I normally get up at 5:15 AM on days I am working, but the fact is that I am so used to waking up in the dark that once the sun is up, I feel as if I have overslept. I tried to make myself fall asleep again this morning, but it just didn't work. By 7:30, I just decided to get up and get some work done. So, I sat at my desk drinking coffee and did some grading.


****************************


I keep returning to the new poem, but the draft evades me right now. Well, to be more precise, I am too much in editor mode, in critic mode. I see the blatant problems in the poem, but I cannot seem to "re-enter" the poem as a writer right now. And I know well that until I can re-inhabit the poem as a writer that I am not going to come up with anything meaningful in terms of revision. Sure I can cut a word here, change a line break or stanza break. But this isn't enough. I know certain words are wrong in terms of tone, but I need to be back in the poem to find a solution that works. So, I spent 45 minutes this morning staring at the poem, reading it and reading it aloud. And all of my suspicions about missteps are right. But I think I will need to give the poem some space and time before anxiously trying to break down its doors to get back inside. I have to be able to just sidle up to it and open the door. Until then, my visitations are pointless.


****************************


A friend of mine just sent me a handful of poems to look over. They blew me away. I mean my socks are on the other side of the room! I can't wait for her to finish her second book. The poems just bristle with nervous energy, with fire.


****************************


Clue: Titus Andronicus


****************************

From a Discussion of Poetic Orientation

"There are numerous theories about the origins of a person’s poetic orientation; most poets today agree that poetic orientation is most likely the result of a complex interaction of environmental, cognitive and biological factors. There is also considerable recent evidence to suggest that biology, including genetic or inborn hormonal factors, play a significant role in a person’s poetic orientation. There are probably many reasons for a person’s poetic orientation and the reasons may be different for different people." (Robert Thomas takes on Orientation of a different kind)


****************************


Just in case you forgot the heyday of Marky Mark, here is a little reminder. You can store this under weekend hotness:




****************************


I don't care what anyone says. Drinking 8 or more glasses of water a day takes work!


****************************


Clue: Frieze


****************************

To Be Considered

"... when I think of the poets whose styles most visibly bear the marks of the New Criticism, I think of poets like Elizabeth Bishop, Randall Jarrell, Robert Lowell, early Adrienne Rich, Donald Justice, John Berryman, and the like: poets who often incorporate forms and manners that would not be out of place in a Renaissance sonnet or a nineteenth-century ode. I think of poets, that is, who are also students of canonical literary history. The same cannot be said of every poet writing what is now considered, or is coming to be considered, "mainstream" poetry."

--K. Silem Mohammad


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New blue gourami and new pleicostomus in the tank. The old gold gourami is just not having the new blue one. I had to put the gold one in isolation so the new blue can acclimate to the tank.


***************************


"What is health? Nothing else than the buoyant, normal exercise of physical faculties, in easy unconsciousness of their mode of acting. The moment there is friction, the moment we become conscious of these functions—in heart, stomach, or brain, for example—which ought to be carried on without sensation, health is broken, and sickness supervenes." (great stuff from the vault!)


***************************


Glad the weekend is here. I feel like I say this a lot lately. It has been busy in clinic, really busy. My partner is gone up to Tahoe for a long weekend with some of her friends. I am jealous. Tahoe is my new favorite place. It is so effing beautiful there.


***************************


Clue: Mephistopheles


***************************

More Sadness

Max Roach passed away. What a strange day.

Tongue? Meet Cheek!

We at The Muse have reopened. We were temporarily closed yesterday, but hey, we do as we please here. Consider THAT bitchy, and me-centered, and a Woe is me comment. And to continue with bitchy--since supposedly that is what I am good at--if you have a beef with me, use your name instead of anonymity. Anonymity is for cowards. Don't like what I say here? Then don't read it. I am not begging anyone to read this blog. I don't even beg Jacob. In fact, I beg no one. How regal is that?! This blog exists here with or without you. So, here is a thing to think about: Here at The Muse, it IS all about me. Me, yes, me, and me! Even when it isn't about me, it is about me, what I think, what I believe, etc. It is ALL ABOUT ME! Mwah-hahaha-haha!


****************************


Did you take the Red pill or the Blue pill?


****************************


I was saddened this morning to learn Liam Rector is no longer with us. Out of respect for his friends and former students, I won't post links about this here. Liam was a good man.


****************************


And remember all the supposed checks and balances installed over the years to prevent another stock market crash of 1929. Well, remember they only work when there is money to shift. Well, a lot of our money has been spent in Iraq. On the order of trillions! The checks and balances exist, but there is less money to shift around. The credit rug is being pulled out and the market is dropping. Prepare yourself for 1929 again! I pray to God the credit dump isn't as large as we think it is right now.


****************************


Clue: Testify, Testimony, Testy, Testicle!


****************************

Puppet

Oh Rudy. Already the Religious Right has installed the strings. The dance begins...

Little Red Corvette?

Astor passed away.


***************************


Tough day yesterday. Never easy to face one's failures. Never easy.


***************************


"There is nothing especially remarkable about getting a ride from a poet, but this car was a Corvette. A long, gleaming, bright blue Corvette. Perhaps he has signed a mega-contract for some blockbuster new ode?"


***************************


FROM THE RONA JAFFE FOUNDATION: Six emerging women writers have been singled out for excellence by the Foundation and will receive awards of $25,000 each. The 2007 winners are Elif Batuman, Sarah Braunstein, Robin Ekiss, Alma García, Jennifer Grotz, and Holly Goddard Jones.

Congratulations to Robin Ekiss and Jennifer Grotz!


***************************


Must run. Cancer Conference this morning. Addled.


***************************


Clue: Semaphore


***************************

Semblance

The birthday party for a friend went well, though it went a little late. And I am feeling that today. A little tired, but okay.


*****************************


Lots of talk last night about influence, emulation, variation, transformation, imitation, etc. A lot to think about.


*****************************


Busy day in clinic today. What is new?


*****************************


Clue: Foundling


*****************************

Alignments

Frank O'Hara would be happy about this, I think...


***************************


I have been revisiting the new poem. A word change here. An adjustment of tone here. I like the idea of these adjustments being like the adjustments chiropractors give. You know, the slow touch and then, SNAP, the poem's spine is realigned! Love that. Sadly, my adjustments are still just on the order of touch, gentle touch. But the poem is coming along. I don't hate it. And even Jacob seems to be warming to it. Sometimes, I really wonder why anyone wants to make poems. Other times I think everyone should want to make poems. And all this really means is that I should be painting. But I am too afraid now to stretch canvas, to mix paint, to actually get physical. I am a tease like that. Always promising...


***************************


Massage Therapist: What on earth did you do this week?
Me: Huh?
MT: Well, you usually carry your stress in your shoulders, but your back is messed up today.
Me: Was on my feet a lot this week. Ran around a lot.
MT: You have some serious knots along your spine.
Me: You mean the paraspinous muscles, right? Not my actual spine...
MT: And you are cranky, too, herr doctor!
Me: Sorry.
MT: [Silence and then his elbow straight into one of these knots]
Me: Aaagghhh! I am SO VERY sorry!


***************************


No one who thinks they are well aligned is well-aligned.


***************************


“Mediocrity is not allowed to poets, either by the gods or man”

--Horace


“Ridicule is the tribute paid to the genius by the mediocrities.”

--Oscar Wilde


I find these infinitely entertaining.


***************************


Clue: Snap!


***************************

Another

My sister delivered! Another nephew. No name or stats yet. What a day!

UPDATE: 8lbs 6 ozs, 22 in, named Elias

Reality?

For all of you out there who love Project Runway, Top Chef, Shear Genius, etc., you simply have to read this.


****************************


Is this day over yet?


****************************


Clue: Birthday Barbecue!


****************************

The Lesser Evil

So, we watched the Forum last night that had the Democratic presidential hopefuls discussing LGBT issues. Many issues were discussed (and you can watch practically all of the broadcast here), but the hot-button topic was, of course, same-sex marriage (those segments are grouped together here). Let me be frank in saying that none of the Democratic front runners thrilled me with their responses. In fact, I dare say that I trust them less now than I did before. I don't really want to get into it further, but they really depressed me. I guess I just have to face the fact there will never be a candidate for President that I will want to stand behind. I always vote, but ever since the first election I was allowed to vote in I have never once voted for someone because I believed in that person. I have always felt as if I was voting for someone because they were the lesser of two evils.


****************************


My best friend returns from Europe tonight. Yay!


****************************


As usual, I am glad today is Friday. But really, clinic this week really spanked me hard.


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I am clearly thinking a lot about this, but I think John Edwards may have been the winner to me in last night's presidential forum. He seemed to be answering the questions and not spewing prescribed, memorized responses. He actually seemed to be trying to answer the questions. Obama was impressive in his responses, but he didn't seem presidential to me. And he seemed, how can I say this, inexperienced in a way Clinton and Edwards aren't. I don't know. As for Clinton, she came across as rehearsed to the nines, the consummate politician. Her answers, like some of Obama's, seemed like soundbites. At one point, I am almost positive that she spewed out a pre-rehearsed answer that didn't really answer the question posed to her. This just means that Clinton will likely be the Democratic candidate. She seems groomed for it. I am pretty sure she is a person who rarely ever, if ever, loses anything. Is that a good thing? I don't know. I am still reserving judgment. But maybe it is time for this country to have a woman president. All I know is I am glad California moved its primary up.


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Thanks to all of you who emailed me good words about my poem "Body & Soul." I was flattered and deeply appreciative. If you want to read the poem, check it out in the current issue of Gulf Coast.


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Clue: Timbaland


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Paranoia

The photographer used only one source of light (it was customary to use three) and placed emphasis on the poet's eyes.


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I dreamt last night I was cramming for my National Oral Board Exams in Radiation Oncology. It seemed so real that I woke up in a mild panic. It took me almost five minutes to realize that I had taken and passed my Boards more than a few years ago now. I actually felt relieved and went back to bed.


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Lunch remains my favorite meal over which to meet someone new or talk to someone I haven't talked to in a very long time. Dinner remains more of an intimate thing for me, reserved for friends, longstanding folks in my life. I have no idea why I think this way. I suspect my upbringing has an answer.


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I have this irrational fear/belief I am being reviewed in the next issue of POETRY. I have no idea why I believe this, but I do. No one official has said this to me. In fact, no one has said this to me at all. But my spidey sense is tingling, and I pray that I am wrong on this one.


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Clue: Where Alph the sacred river ran...


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Body & Soul

I rarely post my own poems here, but a friend overseas asked me to post this here. It is in the current issue of Gulf Coast, a literary magazine published in Houston.


BODY & SOUL

VANISHED

Elements of Disclosure

Some of you may remember my post not too long ago that sported a YouTube clip from the College Republican convention. Well, now the hypocrisy hits the fan. Yup, it always amazes me these folks who go out of their way to make gays and lesbians their scapegoats, only to then betray a deeper psychological motive behind their political views. I am so not surprised by this! Ah, the young Republicans...


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The time is coming soon. I head back to the Mountain in two weeks.


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So, what are you up to in February of 2008? If any of you are interested, there is a pretty amazing Conference in Arizona with a diverse and interesting roster of folks lecturing, teaching, discussing Literature and Writing. What say you?


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The usual errands today, lunch with a friend, etc. And I really am going to try to sit down with the new poem again. We'll see. You all know I am the master of avoidance!


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Clue: Your money's on the dresser, Chocolate...


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Georgia/VQR

The Contemporary Poetry Series at Georgia is dead, but something new is already rising from its ashes. The VQR Series of Poetry is born. With Ted Genoways editing this series, I bet it will be very successful.

The New Mac Diddy

It has arrived! The new iMac, all aluminum-cased and shiny. And check out the new 24" flat screen. Bee-you-tee-full!! I love the fact this is the entire computer. No monster tower. No cables going everywhere. And with wireless Internet and a wireless printer, this computer has got it goin' on! Aw yeah...

Issues

"Blurb says more than 100,000 people have downloaded its software, and it has printed tens of thousands of books in its 14 months. Its main competitor, Lulu, in North Carolina, has been around since 2002, and said it has grown from $1 million in revenue in 2004 to $27 million this year. It has 250,000 authors, and grows by 2,000 authors a day." --Dan Fost, SF Chronicle


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Because we forget just how dangerous it can be out there.


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Bill Gates and/or other such suitable billionaire has yet to call in. Come on mega-rich people, lines are open and operators are standing by.


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Jacob and I booked our accommodations for the upcoming AWP Annual Meeting/Conference. We did our usual thing, and we are staying at a hotel nearby but not at either of the Conference hotels. Jacob goes nuts when we stay at the conference hotel. And I also kind of like being there but getting away from it. I am schizoid like that! But lodging is now taken care of, and next we take care of flight and dinner reservations! Oh, I wish there was a DONE.com. I could so have checked off something on a list and gotten an email that said: "NYC lodging for AWP: DONE!"


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Was surprised to get galleys from a magazine yesterday by pdf. I have gotten them before, but I was under the impression this magazine was very old-fashioned when it came to production issues. I actually like galleys that come as pdf because they reach me wherever I am, even if not at home.


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Clue: Take one down, pass it around...


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Fight! Fight!

Richard Siken and Matthew Zapruder are cage fighting! Yeah, you heard me. The shirts are off. The punches are flying. Matt's pants have been ripped. Oh wait, I am getting a little too carried away here. Oh Jesus, Richard just put Matt into a headlock. And Matt just knocked Richard over. Oh, the possibilities...

Paging Bill Gates or Other Billionaire

Okay, it is definitely a Monday. Day started with an emergency patient that had to be seen, setup for radiation, and treated ASAP. Can we say chicken with head cut off? That was me most of this morning...


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I want a cabin on Lake Tahoe. Yes, I want one. Too bad the cost of land and cabins there is astronomical, even more expensive than land and homes in San Francisco. I need a patron. So, if you are like Bill Gates wealthy and want to give me a home on Lake Tahoe for my undying appreciation and like 50 poems over a lifetime dedicated to you, just ring me up. Operators are standing by.


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Just because I don't say anything here, doesn't mean I don't notice or that I am clueless. I just don't have the time or energy sometimes to engage in po-world bickering and weirdness.


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Clue: She is like a cat in the dark / And then she is the darkness...


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Richer

"I dipped into "Best American Poetry 2006" and found a fabulous poem called "Refusal to Notice Beautiful Women" by Mark Halliday, which I never would have found had I not trusted the taste of Billy Collins. I am one poem richer than I was yesterday."


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"It's as if, in Paths of Glory, Kirk Douglas had actually been able to get all the troops to go over the top: Natasha Trethewey makes the big push and takes the hill from Billy Collins, planting the paperback of Native Guard firmly at number 1." (the words of the Poetry Foundation folk who write up the intro for this thing, not mine!)


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I am having a hard time believing we are already into the second week of August. So odd. Before long, I will be off to Vermont and back. Thankfully, little flying to be done in September, but that is the only the quiet before the storm. I am preparing myself for 4 transcontinental round trip flight to take place between the end of September and Christmas. Gag!


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My younger sister is so pregnant right now that all she can think about is delivering her baby. Any day now, we will have a new member of the family. I am actually routing for a girl. As it stands, all I have are nephews. I kind of want a niece to spoil. We'll see. My sister didn't want to know the baby's gender until birth. Old fashioned, but also kind of exciting.


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Firemen and their hoses. How is it they always seem to get into trouble...











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Clue: This is NOT my first time at the rodeo!


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Impasse

Spent most of yesterday grading and doing teacher stuff. And today, I have been filling out paperwork and trying to get the nerve to revisit the poem I drafted a week or so ago. But I am not in the mood to re-enter that poem right now. What I want to do is get in the car and drive across the Golden Gate Bridge up to Sonoma. Unfortunately, I am on-call, so that is a dream. And because I am on-call and cannot go, it only makes me want to go more. Isn't this always the way of things?


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Maybe it is because I am teaching again, but I ran into this poem sitting on top of my refrigerator (the Poetry Calendar), and it seemed to me the perfect poem for teachers of poetry to read:


AN IMPASSE


Jacques writes from Paris,
"What are the latest news?"

I have told him, time
and time again, "What are"

is not English, "news"
is not plural, "news"

is a singular term,
as in "The news is good."

He replies, "Though 'The news'
may be singular in America,

it is not so in France.
Les nouvelles is a plural term.

To say, 'The news is good'
in France would be bad grammar,

and absurd, which is worse.
On the other hand, 'What are

the news?' makes perfect sense."


--Louis Simpson


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Summer is definitely here. No sun now for days. Just fog, fog, and more fog.


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Clue: British Airways


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Morning Commute Cell Phone Snippet

Mom: So, do you ever do readings of your poems?
Me: Yes.
Mom: Really?
Me: Yeah.
Mom: Do you charge for the readings? How much do people have to pay?
Me: I do charge, but I charge the venue, not typically the people who come to the reading.
Mom: But isn't the point to sell books?
Me: Well, that is part of it, but not the whole point.
Mom: Oh... well, the one reading I went to, it seemed all everyone wanted was to buy the book and get it signed.
Me: Oh, well maybe that is true for fiction writers.
Mom: Oh no. This was a poet. I remember. I was pretty young, but I remember it was a poet. Some poet that used his initials. An American who thought he was a Brit.
Me: T.S. Eliot?!
Mom: Yes, that was his name. He sold well over a hundred books at that reading.
Me: Well, he had a Nobel Prize, mom.
Mom: Well, that is what you need.
Me: I will definitely get working on that.
Mom: Well, you should. You can be kind of lazy sometimes.
Me: Huh?
Mom: You hide your laziness by doing a lot of different things...

[I swear to God this woman will be the death of me or the cause of a nervous breakdown!]

Neurotic, as always

"We understand that writers are notorious gossips. We understand the bitterness of divorce. We understand that the modern media age, with its proliferation of cable television, radio talk shows and personal Web sites, has led to vast amounts of self-absorption and over-sharing. But the main thing we understand is that rarely has being one of Ted Turner's girlfriends looked so good."


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The Poet who haunts my dreams shows up at Ron's blog.


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Is it Friday yet? Yes! It actually is Friday!


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I am actually having odd anxieties about going to Yaddo in October. Not sure why, but every time I read something about Yaddo at Eduardo's blog, I start to become nervous. My greatest anxiety is that I won't get anything done there. Why this anxiety? Because if I get nothing done there, I will have wasted time here I would have used for other things. Oh, I know, this borders on whiny and silly. I am just one of those neurotic worriers. I can always find something to worry about, which will be the death of me.


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My practice partner, Lisa, is off at Lake Tahoe with a bunch of her family. I am so envious. I cannot even believe it was just last week Jacob and I were up there.


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Clue: Barn Social, then bonfire!


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When It Rains...

I just received the following Press Release from the Academy of American Poets:

CHARLES SIMIC RECEIVES THE WALLACE STEVENS AWARD

$100,000 FOR MASTERY IN THE ART OF POETRY

given by the Academy of American Poets

New York, August 2—Charles Simic has been selected as the recipient of the 2007 Wallace Stevens Award from the Academy of American Poets. The $100,000 prize recognizes outstanding and proven mastery in the art of poetry. The Academy’s Board of Chancellors, a body of sixteen eminent poets, nominates and elects the Wallace Stevens Award recipient.


And if you are curious:

The Board of Chancellors of the Academy of American Poets

The Wallace Stevens Award recipient is nominated and elected by the Academy’s Board of Chancellors. The current Chancellors are Frank Bidart, Rita Dove, Robert Hass, Lyn Hejinian, Galway Kinnell, Nathaniel Mackey, Sharon Olds, Carl Phillips, Robert Pinsky, Kay Ryan, Gary Snyder, Gerald Stern, Susan Stewart, James Tate, Ellen Bryant Voigt, and C.K. Williams.

The Trappings

"Gay" Books' sales get scrutinized here. I cannot help but feel this is going to hurt gay writers, especially non-fiction writers. Who knows? The sales figures are grim though for the world of non-fiction. Grim, indeed.


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Charles Simic has been named the new Poet Laureate of the U.S.


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"It's about using poets to well-wish the government. It's about poetry as PR for political functionaries." Ouch!


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Listening again to Debussy's "Clair de Lune". I keep finding more in it. It keeps surprising me. It sounded so simple to me when I first heard it, but each time I return to it, I keep discovering it is far more complicated and complex than I had previously imagined. Elegance. Not the ornate or the baroque, but the beautiful almost classic thing that arises from simplicity or the appearance of simplicity. Conrad understood this. Dostoevsky as well. Debussy clearly does. Some of the French Impressionists knew the impulse behind elegance. I am not sure where I am going with this. Surprise surprise. But I cannot help thinking about elegance right now. And I know some of this is my recent re-reading and teaching of O'Hara. So many elegant poems. So many poems that appear simple but are, in fact, incredibly complex and complicated. "Clair de Lune." The moon. My strangest obsessions. My father used to joke he expected me to become a Philosopher. I have always been a strange creature of interiority. I am in love with the mind and its workings. This is a failure. A great failure.


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Clue: Thistle and Yew, Foxglove and Famine


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In Need of Disinfectant

No, your eyes are not deceiving you. Yup, the Backstreet Boys are "supposedly" back. Dear God! They are like a virus! You think you got rid of it, disinfected the rooms and all, and then you find it again. I love how one of the BB is only a pair of shoes now. That is so cheesy. And yet, I strangely can't stop looking at the photo. Gag!


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Simmons did get in touch with me just now. So, he will be getting his $25 gift cert. Sorry, Ross.


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I am still reeling from the news that Newscorp is buying Dow Jones. Dear God, is the Wall Street Journal going to turn into a print version of Fox News? THAT would a travesty almost as bad as the Backstreet Boys coming back!


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And to the anonymous emailer: No, I don't consider this blog a memoir. It is what it is. Sure, it has memoir qualities at times; but, really, just read it. If this is memoir, it is one effed up kind of memoir. So, read it if you want. Or don't. I am still going to be here writing it. Until I decide not to write it anymore.


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Clue: Minnie


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Rule, Ruler, Ruling, Roulette

Simmons Buntin still has not emailed me to claim his $25 Amazon Gift Certificate. Per our Judge, Jacob, Simmons has until Noon (Pacific Time) today to claim his monetary prize. If he hasn't claimed his prize, the runner up will receive it. Simmons will still be the winner, but when there is a monetary prize, it must be claimed within 5 days of the awarding. What can I say? We at The Muse must establish rules every so often to stave off the chaos...


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Fina Garcia Marruz takes the Pablo Neruda Iberoamerican Poetry Award.


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I am trying to better organize my calendar. I thought I had today off from clinic, but I don't. This is not a new change. It has apparently been like this on my clinic calendar for two months. Starting yesterday, I have begun merging my personal calendar with my clinic calendar, my on-call calendar, my literary calendar, my teaching calendar, my business/administrative schedule, and my editorial schedule. When finished, I will have one master calendar, and I WILL RULE THE WORLD! Just kidding. But at least I won't be committing to things I shouldn't be doing or turning things down when I actually have time. And maybe I will be less stressed because I won't need to be in two places at one time. We will see.


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Getting ready to re-enter the new poem draft. I have been good and have left it alone now for a week. This weekend, I should have time to re-examine it. I intend to be vicious! Nothing will escape my eye. You think I am mean to your work. You haven't seen what I do to my own work!


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I got a very big surprise yesterday, a check from Gulf Coast for a poem of mine that appears in the current issue. I was surprised because I didn't remember GC paying honoraria. Anyhoo, thanks Gulf Coast: originally for publishing the poem; and now for the check!


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I am now going to NYC three times between September 30th and November 15th! How is that possible? I will be flying Virgin America so much I will start feeling both a Virgin and American!


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Clue: I am your father!


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